Lately I have not been able to remember my dreams well, which is something that I never had a problem with before. All my life I have been able to remember most of my dreams, every night it was a new adventure in vivid color and detail. I would see whole plots carried out in my dreams, and often they would haunt me into the daytime.
I always thought it was cool to be able to remember my dreams, because I talk to so many people who just don’t. I always thought those people were missing out, you know? Dreaming is this whole part of my life, it’s a thing that happens just about every day, so it’s something I have come to take for granted.
Something is happening though, I am having trouble remembering my dreams and it is really starting to stress me out.
What happens is – I know that I’ve had a dream, but I can’t remember what the dream was about. Like this morning Elise woke me up, jumping into my bed. As soon as I woke up I was very alert, and the first thing I said to her was “Wow, I had a crazy dream, I have to write it down!” But seriously, as soon as I said that I forgot all about what I was dreaming.
Throughout the day though, the dream haunted me. I kept having these weird flashes of dream – remembering being with a bunch of families, people with children, waiting – getting ready to go somewhere – everything feeling very urgent.. It was kind of creepy, the dream, that’s what I think anyway.
It’s all very strange. NOT remembering my dreams make me think even MORE about the dream during the day than if I knew exactly what the dream was about.
Where I have been lacking in dreams I have been totally making up for in ideas.
I stopped writing Arctura last week (yeah, yeah, I KNOW). There are a few reasons for that, only one of them being a good one, which is that I have been having a curious influx of really good yet complicated ideas.
Before I start writing a book, I usually just THINK about it for a few days to a week. Sometimes I write down some ideas, but I never really outline because I am still convinced it kills my writing and I am not yet ready to test that theory. So I’ve been getting all of these great ideas to think about, and it’s awesome. One of the ideas is so good (in my oh so humble opinion) I don’t even want to mention it in the slightest or talk about it to anyone because it is SO GOOD I’m afraid someone will want to steal it. I know, isn’t that pretentious of me?
But, I’ve had another idea today, which I think is somehow connected to the mystery dream I had last night, and I am going to flesh it out a little bit tonight. I’m back on the writing wagon – 2,000 words a day or bust. It works well for me. Keeps me busy, keeps me honest.
I wanted to blog every day for a year just to show myself that I could do it. I have recently been able to complete my first monthly challenges, like NaBloPoMo, just last year. I am not a very good blogger, I don’t think. I don’t stick to a certain topic, I don’t have a niche, I wonder if I have a “voice” as it were. I don’t really know what I am doing here sometimes, other than I know I just love to write on the internet and talk to other writers on the internet, so I’m here, doing it. But then, I am not doing it because so often in the last couple of weeks I have half-assed the blogging or worse, and wonder whether its still prudent for me to cross this off my life list when I’m currently on an 85 day streak over at 750words, and to me that is a much bigger accomplishment.
So I am just going to do this, when I feel like it, because this is my blog and NYAH!
Fringe is excellent. I am finishing up the first season right now and nope, can’t stop won’t stop.