Future Growing Pains

CheneyLetters To Elise4 Comments

Elise and I have been going through some things lately.

She’s struggling with fitting in and finding her place in the world.

I’m struggling with the fact that she is growing up and HAVING to find her place in the world.

attablewithglowglasses

I know some people go bonkers over their kids growing up. I feel like I was always the opposite. I was always thinking to myself “grow up, grow up” because it seemed to me, in a way, that every year that went by got better, every day week month year that went by, I loved her more.

I always thought, why do people want their kids to stay little when it’s as they get older that you really get to know who they are and bond with them as people…

I didn’t know what the hell I was thinking. I had no idea, and how could I have? I have never had an almost 9 year old before.

bundledupwithshadeselise

At her physical on Tuesday her doctor kept saying “You’re almost half-way grown, you’re almost half-way grown.” Meaning, at almost 9, she’s almost half way to 18. To like, an adult. In college, anyway.

Insert gut-stab.

So yeah, what the hell was I thinking? We’re going to go through so much shit as she gets older. Puberty. Boys. Dating. All those things that her dad just tries to block out of his mind and say aren’t going to happen at all, that’s what I think about, because I know that’s what girls are constantly thinking about, too. Sorry, Dad.

But no, I am not ready for that. I want her to be little for just a little while longer. I feel like when 10 comes, when we reach double digits, something will shift. That will be a serious tipping point, and maybe, I don’t know? Will that be when I lose my baby?

Or is it true, what they say? She’ll always be my baby.

4 Comments on “Future Growing Pains”

  1. Yes she’ll always be your baby. You will route for her to succeed and want to be there to pick her up when she falls. Sometimes you will look at your grown up child and see your little baby. She’ll marry have children and you will have grandchildren that will steal the rest of your heart. My youngest grandchild is eleven and I just want them to stop aging because the world is too mean for them. I think watching the grans growing up is harder.

Feel like sharing some thoughts?